Just as I pulled through the intersection with a four-way stop sign, I saw a police car parked a half a block away. As I slowly eased on through the intersection, I saw the police car pull away from the curb. Oh, shit, I thought. I bet he is going to stop me.
I fit the profile: Old white guy, in a late model Volvo, clean shaven, casually dressed. I had left my hoody at home; it’s a bit hot here today for the hoody. I had just switched the radio from loud rap music to NPR. I looked like I could be someone’s grandfather.
Sure enough, he was after me. I have watched “Cops” on TV, so I knew to turn off the engine and stay in the car. He came up to the door but stayed behind me somewhat. I had to turn my head way around to see him. He acted as if he didn’t want me to see his face. Since he was the one that stopped me, I thought I would let him start the conversation. He did. He wanted to see my driver license, registration, and proof of insurance.
I guess based on my profile, he didn’t feel the need to look up my license plate or call to see if I had any outstanding warrants, because he never left to go back to his car to do that.
He asked, “Do you know why I’m stopping you?”. I ventured a wild guess and said, “Could it have been for that rolling stop I made at the stop sign?”. Yes, it was. Honesty is usually the best policy.
Then, again probably based on my profile, he said he was only going to give me a warning. Or it could have been because I looked so pitiful, old, remorseful, non-combative. I can really turn it on if I need to.
After that the lecture started. I paid full attention. I would have taken notes but I didn’t have any paper. I nodded in agreement about how a ticket can go on your record, causing your insurance to go up. I got wide-eyed when he explained about all the reports from this neighborhood about drivers running stop signs. Ooo! I guess crime is rampant around here. Then, I interjected, “I live in this neighborhood, I hope that drivers obey the stop signs”. I should have been penalized for saying something so cheesy as that, but I wasn’t. Afterwards, I realized that I had broken one of the rules for how to act when you are stopped by the POLICE. Keep your hands in sight and don’t say anything unless you are asked a question. Only answer the question.
After the lecture, he just kind of disappeared back to his car. I didn’t get a chance to say how much I admired the police and that I rarely get stopped and how I have an uncle that is a retired police office. I didn’t even ask him his name. I didn’t know the etiquette about who should drive away first. But, since I was in front, I left first. I stuck my head out of the window to look back for oncoming traffic before pulling away. I wanted to look like a model of driving perfection.
I must admit I came to a full stop at every one of the damned stop signs on my way home.
